Vampire Shirts &Disobeying Him

Mmm. Long walks, just figuring out the thoughts in my head, figuring out what to put in my blog.
Lots of things..
He doesn’t understand it takes nothing for him to turn me on. This morning, he bit me on the back of the neck. A rush of PleasurePain went through me, and because I’m on my period, I didn’t want to fuck and get it everywhere, so I was like, ‘stop…’
God, I LOVE his bites. I think Bear is a good nickname-we’re quite animalistic people anyway, but he has nips of affection, bites where he just lazily leaves his teeth there (like my friends kitten..) and hard, sexual bites. All of them turn me on, every time.
I think my constant fantasising annoys him, though. I’m a hugely sexual person and I invent lots of scenarios that I’d be totally happy with Bear doing, so I doubt I’d ever get bored of him. I noticed today that he has a hardness to his face-to his jaw, and his eyes are a very cold blue, but there’s a softness in his smile, and in his sleep.
Things I’ve been fantasising about recently..
I dream about being collared constantly, an outward sign to the world that I’m owned. I wish he’d say that more, too. I think about him coming onto the collar..When it’s off me, when its ON me. I wish he’d buy me a piece of slave jewelry, I love the sort of ‘Story of O’ rings. Like I’d ask, though.
I want him to fuck me up the arse-I want him to hold my hips and drive himself into me brutally. God, I remember the first time Bear fucked me up the arse. I’d only enjoyed it once with my exboyfriend, and we did it very gently, spooning. Bear &I tried that for ages but it was just NOT going up my arse. So we fucked doggy, but suddenly, he just PUSHED himself up there. I was biting the pillow with the pain and the force, but when he was actually up there, it was amazing. I love him to assfuck me, my cunt totally reacts and gets into it.
He showed me this vampiristic shirt he has this morning..Black with all eyelets and strings. Quite loose, it could do with being tighter. But I’m obsessed with him wearing that and fangs at the moment, and just biting me. I want him to handcuff me up and bite me whilst I’m helpless.
We had a night out with my friends, then I went home to meet his mum. I could feel the sexual tension in the air and I was absolutely dying for her to go to bed. She did, eventually, and I started fooling around in Bears jeans..(I bought him a pair of black boxers with a green snake on yesterday..very tight, very nice. Shows off his bulge greatly :) but he was all ‘I can’t have sex when my mum’s in the house’. That old chestnut. Like the whole ‘I can’t fuck you when your parents are in’..I don’t know why he makes these promises.
So I got on my knees and started sucking him, trying to ease his jeans off his hips when he was distracted. He was sighing, ‘I can’t, I can’t.’
I said, ‘If you couldn’t, you’d be stopping me. You’ll get sucked, but you won’t fuck me?’ The four gins I had were making me feel quite brave, I’m usually not very good at all at voicing stuff, so I looked at him directly and was like, ‘You know you want me.’
He nodded.
I said, ‘What are you gonna do if I just sat on you, how are you gonna stop me?’
Long story short, we ended up fucking. It was amazing. It’s such a RELIEF to get on his dick after getting wet for so long, begging for it, giving him everything he needs, and seeing it that hard. I have a total lovehate relationship with my period, because even though its great lube (ha), its obviously messy and not very pleasant. Bear doesn’t mind though, which is GREAT. I squirted blood all over his chest accidently once, but we both actually ended up enjoying that quite a lot. So I was riding him, trying to be quiet because of his mother, not really succeeding because of how hard he was, and how we were both fully dressed..Him flies down, me dress up, just for the purpose, like teenagers. He told me he’d came, which was odd because I can usually tell.
This morning, he was feeling really stressed. He got hold of my hand by the wrist and put it down his pj bottoms. ‘Make me happy’ he instructed.
I started to stroke him..God, his full lips parting, biting them..But then he moved my hand again. ‘Balls.’ He said. He usually likes them grabbed tight and tugged on hard, but he said, ‘gently.’ I alternated between stroking him and playing with his balls for about ten minutes, then he said ‘Stop’.
I was disappointed, I asked, ‘Why?’
He looked surprised. ‘You’re my obedient little slavegirl, and you have to do anything I ask.’
I smiled. ‘Put a finger up your arse.’ He said, not a trace of amusement on his face.
I hate disobeying, but I said ‘No!’-I felt it’d look really unflattering, would be messy and there would be no real point.
‘You’re disobeying a direct order?’ He asked. I reminded him that I’d also said no to reverse cowgirl a few days earlier. My reason is I hate my arse. But then I thought, we do it from behind, how lame. I do completely hate saying no to him, I do wish I could be completely obedient to him but I just can’t let myself go. So he let me stroke him (whilst I watched my hands work in his mirrored wardrobe, quite hot) until his hot arc of white shot up and hit him in the shoulder and splashed across his chest. Fucking BEAUTIFUL.